Area Woman Who Doesn’t Love Burgers Makes Smashburger Video
(It’s FINALLY) Home Movies Tuesday!
Hello and welcome to Home Movies Tuesday! If you’ve found your way over by some miracle but are not yet subscribed, here, let me help you with that:
Hello, and WELCOME BACK to Home Movies Tuesday. As I’ve mentioned, it’s been a hectic few weeks for everyone, but we are back and grateful to be here. Thank you for your patience!
Onto why we are here: SMASH BURGERS. SMASHBURGERS. ONE WORD OR TWO? Inconclusive. If you’ve come here for some “best juiciest most foolproof burger ever” content I will say you will be disappointed, but if you’d like to see how I like my smashburger and also how to ruin a spatula in under 60 seconds, please tune in.
I am historically not a burger person, choosing instead to favor hot dogs or literally any other food when given the option. But a smashburger, well, it feels like they are in a category all on their own, and I gotta be honest: I’d die for them.
That said, much like the way I like my ice cream (specifically mint ‘n’ chip, specifically from Baskin Robbins or Thrifty’s/Rite Aid), I am particular about what goes onto the smashburger in order for me to enjoy it. The way some people can only fall asleep to sound machines swaddled in a weighted blanket, my smashburger must be draped with a single slice of American Cheese, slid onto a bun slathered with an embarrassing amount of mustard and piled high with raw onions and several sheets of iceberg lettuce. There must also be pickles, both on the side and on the burger itself. I will not entertain tomato or tomato product (ketchup) and mayonnaise can take a hike, the most wholesome way of telling something or someone to leave you alone forever (mayonnaise, you’re welcome on my BLT and in my tuna).
As far as my training goes vis-a-vie the execution, I would like to extend a deep thank you to my good friend Amiel Stanek, who I’ve watched make smashburgers more times than I can count. While my burger will never hold a candle to my griddle daddy (I simply can’t smash the way he smashes!), I have learned everything I know from him and feel if one day I can make a burger that’s half as good as his, I will have succeeded. In life.
Anyway, sorry in advance for all the screaming in this episode, I feel deeply and passionately! It’s a blessing and a curse! See you next time for more Home Movies.
AR
Our beloved Home Movies has returned at long last, with a recipe that can only be described as Summer Canon. I have long been a smashburger devotee, so much so that my mom made “fake shack” burgers for my high school graduation party. The one thing all my favorite burgers have in common is the thin, griddled, crispy patty topped with melted american cheese. This combination is at the center of my favorite burger from my favorite restaurant Long Island Bar. I get a single patty burger (which used to be called the ladies burger, and if I’m honest, I miss that) with sheets of lettuce, thinly sliced onion, pickles, a little special sauce, some extra mustard, and–at LIB and LIB only–bacon, because it’s a crispy bacon wheel instead of sad strips that don’t fit the burger. It’s innovation at its finest, and it’s delightful. I got so excited to eat this burger once that I bit directly into the toothpick and popped my veneer off. No regrets ❤️
If I’m making a burger at home? It’s gonna be this burger every time, no notes (though I am sometimes team special sauce, sorry AR!!). It’s easy (no grill needed), can be made vegetarian or vegan with a substitute like Impossible or Beyond, and is sure to get your lucky friends extremely hyped when you invite them over for BURGER NIGHT on a random weekday (invite me too please, I’ll bring chips and beer).
Thank you to my best friend, FreshDirect, for sponsoring this episode and for always delivering what I need, for Home Movies and in my personal life. If you'd like to try FreshDirect, you can use the code 'roman' at checkout for $50 off your first order of $99 or more. Click HERE to shop everything I used so you can make these smashburgers as soon as possible.
This is clearly less of a recipe and more smashburger inspiration with a written through technique that you can reference for the smash part of the smashburger (the video will be the most helpful here, really). TLDR (TLDWatch?):
-When using beef, mash the patty into the skillet like your life depends on it, since animal protein will always contract when first put into contact with a heat source. So upon first skillet contact, it’s imperative you smash, press, then smash some more. Keep smashing! Never stop smashing.
-When using plant-based meat, know that it doesn’t contract the same way beef does, so you don’t have to smash as much or as hard when…smashing. It also has included sodium, so you may not have to salt the patty depending on you preference and tolerance for saltiness (my preference is A LOT and my tolerance is HIGH).
-Purchase a sturdy spatula (for the smashing). I like this one, although it is massive and not home-storage friendly (mine does not fit into any drawers and is currently just displayed on a shelf, for all to see).
-Slice your onions thinly. Use a mandolin if you must. This will ensure they get cooked enough when griddled and are also palatable when you pile them raw onto your finished burger.
Smashburgers
makes 4 burgers
Even if this burger doesn’t go exactly according to plan, you’ll likely end up with something wonderful. But if you’re striving for perfection, the two most important things to me are the onions (slice them thinly– use a mandolin if you must), and the spatula (it should be strong, sturdy, unbendable). Listed below are the toppings in the video, but if you are a special sauce person or a ketchup person or a no-onions person, please, customize away, just let me make my mustard burger in peace.
12 oz ground beef (85/15) or ground impossible/ beyond
Kosher salt
1 large yellow onion, very thinly sliced
½ head iceberg lettuce, pulled into sheets
2 kosher dill pickles, thinly sliced
4 slices american cheese
4 buns of your choice
Yellow mustard
Potato chips of your choice
More pickles, sliced lengthwise into spears
1. Divide meat of your choice into 4–5 pieces (approximately 3–4 ounces each), rolling each gently into a little ball. I like to do this on a sheet tray, especially if doing a lot at once.
2. Meanwhile, heat a large cast iron skillet over high heat until very, very hot.
3. Toast bun in skillet until lightly golden. Heat the bottom of the spatula for a few seconds on the hot pan, then add patty (two if there’s room) to the skillet and smash it with the spatula until it’s very thin. Cook, without moving it, until it’s very crispy and browned. Add some onions to the patty, press them in with the spatula, then flip. Add a slice of American cheese to the top of each patty and continue to cook until the cheese is melted and the onions on the bottom are nice and griddled. Repeat this process with the remaining patties. If you’re making a lot of burgers, carefully wipe your skillet between batches to avoid any super burnt pieces.
4. Assemble the burgers to your liking. The HM order of operations is mustard on bottom bun, pickles, patty, more raw onion on top, sheet of iceberg, top bun.
Yay! Home Movies! I similarly only like mustard, cheese and pickles on my burger. And thick burgers can take a sloppy hike. :)
Thanks for making burgers, and simple, and good. So tired of cheffy things. So happy, as a tired cook, to have good eats. Thanks, Alison. Oh, and Thrifty cones are still a thing in CA? Bet they're not 15 cents per perfect little cylindrical scoop, as this enthralled Brit discovered them as a teen in Sacramento, so many years ago. Thanks for the memory, too. ❤️